Blog

We need good leaders. In our church and in our country real leadership is needed, now more than ever. A poor leader can cause lots of turmoil, politicking, and division. What are the qualities that make for beloved, effective leaders? What are traits of leaders who cause more damage than good? How can you lead well at home, in work, or in community? 

I love the beatitude that says, Blessed are those who are gentle; they will inherit the earth (Matt 5:5). Jesus is saying something amazing: God will bless those who are gentle. And the whole world will be theirs.  Gentleness is a key to having positive influence on others.  Whether you’re a pastor, a parent, a spouse, a boss, a community or world leader, if you want to be good at it – be gentle! 

In the Bible there are only two people who are described as gentle – Moses, and Jesus. And what astonishing leaders they were!  And great leaders past and present have always been gentle people – Abraham Lincoln, Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., Mother Theresa, Pope Frances have all approached everyone with a gentleness so winsome even those who have disagreed with them wanted to be their friends. 

The Bible is full of stories of great leaders and poor leaders. I learn a lot from the story of three Kings of Israel – David, his son Solomon, and his son Rehoboam. Under David and Solomon Israel flourished, was united, harmonious, and happy. But then came Rehoboam. This younger king started out smart. He went to the elders of the people and asked them for their advice, saying ‘I don’t know that much and have a lot to learn, and you know a lot, so I’ll listen what you say about how to lead well.’ They told him that the people would follow him if he would do two simple things: 1) genuinely serve people and show them you’re there to meet their needs. And 2) speak to them always with gentleness.  Do these two things and they’ll follow you anywhere. 

Unfortunately, Reheboam thought that sounded weak, so instead, he listened to his younger friends. They gave him terrible advice: “Act tough, take control, prove you’re in charge, that you’re the king!” They thought leadership meant being demanding and commanding, pushy, and stubborn.  So that’s what this young king decided to do. How did that work out for him? Well, at first there were noisy rumblings behind the scenes and a growing discontent in the people.  People became disillusioned and uncooperative. Riots and chaos ensued. A bunch of them split off, and the united kingdom Reheboam inherited divided, became the northern and southern kingdoms, and never returned to the former days of harmony and strength. Reheboam just wouldn’t be gentle, humble, and helpful. And that was dumb. In truth, anyone who has to stand up and point out to the room, ‘Hey, I’m the leader here!’ will soon be trying to lead ‘over there’ somewhere, but not ‘here.’   

Anybody who wants to influence their family, their co-workers, and their church with effective leadership must be gentle like Jesus. Pastors, politicians, and bosses all need to learn the strength of gentleness. Meekness isn’t weakness. It’s strength. If you’re a parent, don’t try to get your kids to listen to you by shouting or bullying them. Keep your voice soft and sure while standing your ground on important things. A gentle answer lowers anger, but a harsh word causes anger in return (Pr 15:1). If you’re a spouse, and your partner blows a gasket, responding in kind may put someone in a casket. Better to respond with a quiet voice and a listening answer, and when things cool down, a new understanding will likely enrich your marriage. If you’re a pastor, speak only with a gentle voice and spirit, especially when others disagree with you, and everyone will respect you. 

In Scripture the word for ‘gentle’ or ‘meek’ is ‘prautes.’ They used this word to describe a powerful horse that had been tamed and bridle, one that now had controlled strength.  To be gentle isn’t to be weak. It’s bridled strength. It’s power under control. It’s the secret to strong leadership in church, home, and world. A calm spirit overcomes many mistakes (Ecc 10:4). 

If you need a model for how to lead well, identify the gentle men and gentle women who exhibit strength through humility. Turn away from the Reheboams who will only divide, hurt, and depress the people around them. Turn toward those who show you they are more like the Jesus who said, Follow me, for I am gentle, and humble of heart, and you will find rest for your soul (Mt 11:29). 

We’re at the start of a new year.  Why not go into it like a feather – light and gentle, trusting God to be your best leader, relaxing in Jesus’ care, being flexible and able to sail with the greatest of ease on the Spirit’s breeze.  Jesus said, My yoke is easy. My burden is light. Let’s follow his kind of leadership. Let’s enter this year with a gentle touch.